Seams of pure gold

Broken and suffering
I fall to my knees
feeling I have somehow failed
in this race of human existence.
In life thus far
I have not managed
to achieve perfection
happiness or
enlightenment.
Now I am no longer sure
what they mean
what I am aiming for.
A cloudy veil descends
among my thoughts
stealing away clarity and
clear judgement.

Exhausted by my efforts
I finally let go, give in.
Take my imperfections
my foibles and failings.
Do with them what you will.
I surrender.

Gently
kindly
I am lifted up and reformed
soldered together with
seams of pure gold
that do not hide
or cover up
my suffering, my failings
but embrace and celebrate them.
I am pieced together with
a gossamer golden thread.
An object made beautiful
by announcing the scars
the hurts, the wounds and
letting them sit side by side
with seams of pure gold.
The cracks that formed
allow the light that was always present
to shine forth
revealing for myself and for the world
an inner being of oneness
that has been patiently waiting
to be set free.

No more seeking
for perfection
happiness
enlightenment.
I already am what I seek to become.
The light that shines
is revealed through the cracks.
Kintsugi*

* Japanese form of pottery, mending broken pieces with gold.

© 7 Feb 16