Monday 28 April 2014

Our final goodbye


Today
offering you loving kindness
I realised
you were no longer
the ‘difficult’ person because
there was no emotional charge
in thinking of you.
The emotional lens through which
I was viewing our relationship
has fallen away
and I now accept
there is no relationship.

I don’t know what makes you happy,
or sad, or angry, or joyful.
I have no idea
how you spend your time
or what delights you.

Even the letting go 
of any idea of a relationship
no longer makes me feel sad.
The person I wanted doesn’t exist and
the person you are means
no more to me than any
stranger I pass on the street.
I wish you happiness, joy and wellbeing
in the same way I wish 
for all beings in the world.
The emotional ties that
once bound us together
are undone at last,
I am free to move on
thinking of you with 
no more regret or longing.

As I write
there is a part of me
wanting to cry,
to hold on.
Hold on to what?
To a distorted image of someone
who was once 
part of my life and
is no more.
Holding on would be to grasp
at empty air and
try to create something substantial
out of the wind. 

I have learned to let go
to accept.
This is our final goodbye.
© 26 Apr 14

2 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for your poem and also the one before beginning of April (you are the mud...)...

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  2. You are so welcome! They are addressed to particular people (I won't say who!!) but I'm glad you find them meaningful. Thanks for the comment x

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